Grow as You Go Week 5: Bloom Where...ever You Want
Welcome to our Penultimate Week! Look how much You’ve Grown!
Have you ever heard the phrase “bloom where you’re planted?” I have sometimes wondered, what does that really mean? I suppose the meaning changes when you actually know where you’re planted. For example, if you’re planted in rough, rocky soil, maybe it means to bloom despite the less-than-ideal circumstances. Making the most of a bad situation. Or maybe it’s a commentary on how to behave when feeling immobilized, a way of telling us to thrive in periods of stagnation.
I guess I’m still not exactly sure what that idiom is getting at... But I do know where I’m going with this, so stay with me here. Imagine a world with no barriers. No obstacles to keep you from realizing your vision of your full potential. Doesn’t that just sound lovely? Idealistic even?
Well I hate to burst your bubble, but that’s just not happening in this life or the next, unfortunately. But take comfort knowing that these obstacles are part of the universal human experience Though yours always feel particularly difficult, you are not alone. Sometimes, the greatest hurdles are closest to your finish line, and this last leg of the race is about diligence, persistence, and strategy. Picture your hurdles visually on a racetrack; what’s your plan of action?
There’s an old playground diddy that may help. “If we can’t go under it, and we can’t go over it, oh no! We’ve got to go through it!” (Side note, the song actually originates from a children’s storybook called We’re Going on a Bear Hunt by Michael Rosen. Learn somethin’ new everyday, don’t we?!) Anyway, when picturing your hurdles, try this thought experiment. What are some ways you can go over them? What are some ways you can go around them? And most challenging, how can you push through them? Take some time to think through these questions; you know your obstacles best, meaning you will also be the expert on what solutions are most applicable to your situation. The answers you come up with are your strategy. This is the guide you can follow when you lose your way or fatigue sets in. Rely on your “training:” the work you’ve done in recovery, and trust that you’ve built the stamina and exercises to get you through to your finish line. Takeaway #1 is to bloom strategically where there are obstacles by using what you’ve learned, and believing in yourself enough to apply it.
Take a moment to name your hurdles: finance? time? apathy? fear? etc.
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I want to circle back to the other possible interpretation of “bloom where you’re planted,” the idea that it’s about adaptability. Evolutionarily, many plants tend to adapt to their environment and not the other way around. Fighting against your entire set of circumstances is a real energy zapper, plant-wise and person-wise. In order to survive, many desert plants have adapted their roots to be particularly shallow and widespread or very long to best absorb water, via rain or underground stores respectively. Similarly, many have waxy leaves to prevent quick evaporation.
It may seem that plants in tropical environments naturally have everything they need, but the most successful have also mastered the art of adaptation. Think of the especially large leaves in shorter rainforest plants that have grown wide to best soak up what little sunlight reaches down. Also to adjust to the dimness of cloud cover, the most successful plants attract insects by donning the vibrant colors we typically envision when we think of the tropics. They also tend to have defense mechanisms, such as poison or thorns, to protect against hungry herbivores.
Water-dwelling plants have also made big changes over time. They tend to be resistant to root rot and taller to best reach sunlight. Many even float to thrive in muddy conditions which would otherwise outweigh their leaves and drown their odds of survival.
What adaptations can you make to better fit your expectations with your environment? This doesn’t necessarily mean adjusting your goal, but rather changing your perspective or personally defining your inner idea of contentment. This is your second takeaway: adapt to where you’re planted, when it is not in your ability or best interest to change the circumstances. For example, if your weight has changed in a way you were not anticipating, how else can you look for tangible indicators of success? Perhaps noticing your happiness, mental state, sleep patterns, sociability, and physical performance as additional markers of progress. We haven’t moved the finish line, we’ve simply changed the flag.
“It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent. It is the one that is most adaptable to change.”
The last takeaway is that sometimes, you don’t have to do anything! You can bloom wherever you want! As we approach the end of our goals, there can be a bittersweetness. The race you’ve been running for so long has the checkered flag in sight, and your feelings of pride may be momentarily eclipsed by a melancholic longing or sentimentality. You should make an effort to give those grieving sensations the space they need, but try not to take too long to begin celebrating. (There will be more on this next week!) Maybe your journey had a specific start line, a priority place where you feel you were planted. But I believe it’s time to amend that old saying. I’m here to tell you once again to bloom wherever you want. If you feel you’ve outgrown your garden pot, maybe there’s a very good reason: you have.
Take a look around at the race you’ve run; is it really over? Or is it actually a triathlon? Are there more events you wish to move on to in your journey towards healthy peace with nutrition? Perhaps, for example, you’ve conquered binge eating and now you’d like to work on incorporating mindful movement. This could be the next leg of your race. When deciding whether you’re ready to move on to the next leg, or expand to a bigger pot, consider the following:
Best one major goal at a time. Be mindful about taking on too much at once, and try to be confident in your level of completion with your last big challenge
Let yourself have the room you need to grow. If you are ready to keep progressing and take on something new, it’s perfectly fine to take time to assess that instinct. But don’t hold yourself back when you know it’s time to move on
Observe what does and does not serve you in your current environment. Bring what works into your new chapter, and leave what does not work behind
Obstacle-proof yourself based on your previous experience. Prepare for challenges proactively and have a plan
Motivation, what is your impetus for continuing to this next chapter? Name one or two driving factors behind your next goal. Take those ideas and make a record of them. It’s a great way to check back in throughout the process, and know when you’ve reached your new finish line
That’s right, another acronym! She’s at it again! Use B.L.O.O.M. to help you remember these steps to ponder when getting ready for a transition.
Deciding when to transfer your metaphorical blooms to a more suitable environment is never easy, but it is absolutely necessary in order for growth to continue. If you’re not quite ready yet, that’s okay! Possibility permeates time; you can always wait to make a change. Growth and comfort seldom coexist, but when it does feel right, make your next move. You may feel like a sprout again, considering how looming new environments and goals can appear at first. But take heart in the fact that, hey, you’ll grow into it.
“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve [their] world.”
To Recap Lesson V: Bloom Where..ever You Want
Takeaway #1
Bloom strategically where there are obstacles by using what you’ve learned; believe in your ability to employ your built-in skills and tools
Takeaway #2
Bloom adaptively where you’re planted, when it is not in your ability or best interest to change the circumstances
Takeaway #3
Bloom wherever you want; push yourself to take a chance at blooming in a larger pot
Need a little inspiration while you reflect on your next steps? Enjoy these stories of people deciding to make very big changes. A prisoner who hasn't talked to anyone in years comes up with a bold plan to re-introduce himself to the world. A 90-year-old woman shocks her family when she falls in love. And more…
“They say a goldfish can only grow as large as its tank, a sign that the living are only limited by the boundaries of our environment. Change is really hard, but it’s truly the only constant. Metamorphosis is natural and evolution is a powerful survival skill. Honor yourself as a growing being by shedding old skin when you’ve grown out of it. Acknowledge how far you’ve come, and keep moving forward. I wish you all the best as you take your next leaf of faith!
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About the Author
"Kymber Stephenson is a Registered Dietitian Nutritionist living and working in the Greater Denver area. Her experience began with a love of food which led her to pursue a degree in Culinary Arts from Johnson & Wales University. As her love of science and helping people wove with that initial path, she continued on to a Bachelor of Science in Culinary Nutrition with a dual concentration in clinical dietetics and culinary food science.
Kymber is especially passionate about eating disorder management and prevention. In this vein, she focuses on educating clients about the multi-faceted ways history, marketing, food systems, culture, psychology, and body image affect health and relationships to nutrition, food, and body. She works with clients to truly fall in love with food again, acknowledging not only its nourishing properties, but truly embracing its comforts, tradition, and fun! Working in a client-guided manner with a Health at Every Size approach, she strives to help each unique person reach their idea of peace and satisfaction in their bodies and their overall lives. Kymber's driving philosophy is that all people deserve equitable access to quality food and evidence-based nutrition education, regardless of status or background."